The Start of New Beginnings...

Why just now??!

2007-06-18T22:35:50Z

It's been a while since I last updated my journal. I've been busy with work. Aargghhhh!! Always work. Hay!!! A lot of reports, a lot of tallying, a lot of emails, a lot of etc.

But guess what? Our company teamed up with this start-up call center. Guess who is the owner of it? A guy who also owns a security agency. And he owned the security agency who handled F4 concerts here in Manila. Hahahaha!

R: You looked so familiar.
Me: You too.
R: Have we met before?
Me: I don't think so... But I think I saw you somewhere.
R: Haha! Me too. I think I've seen you before.
Me: Hmmmm.

After a few days, I just heard him and our HR Director talking:

HR: That's Johan, she's been to ALL F4 events here in Manila, including Cebu.
R: Haha! That's where I saw you. Haha!
Me: Oh yes!! hahahahaha!!
R: So tell me, who do you like best?
Me: Isn't it obvious (pointing at my desk)
R: So you like Ken?
HR: Like is not the word to describe it. It's LOVE
Me: I do... yes...

And the story continues....

I've heard a lot of stories before about F4 events here in Manila. But the stories I heard from him were so different... Hahaha!!!

Also, he was the one who planned the security for the Fab 5, Mandy Moore, Mariah etc.... And soon, for Christina Aguilera....

Am I lucky or not?

Last Saturday was a blast!

2007-04-30T17:52:12Z

Type your cut contents here.

Last Saturday was a blast!

Ang gwapo ng babies namin!

Ang daming goodies!!!

Lola Agnes, blouse at shorts na lang ang kulang and we're ready to go! Next time yun pasalubong mo ha!! Kung ala naman, pera na lang!

Ang daming VCD goodies!!! Wahahaha!

Ang gwapo ni ZZ

Ang gwapo ni Jerry

Ang yummy ni Vanness

And...

Mahal ko pa din si Ken!!!

Botchog with Fiona...

Ako at si Fiona...

SI BOTCHOG!!!! Wahahahahhahaha!!!

My Ohana....

My Celebrity look-alike...Part 2...Hmmm...

2007-03-06T15:32:02Z

hahaha!!! i like!!!

My Celebrity look-alike... =P

2007-03-06T15:14:16Z

hahahaha!!! I like it!!! =)

What Does Your Birth Date Mean For Your Love Life?

2007-03-01T16:49:56Z

Your Birthdate: January 18

For you, love is a feeling that lingers for really long time - even after a relationship is totally over.
In fact, you still make have strong feelings for the first person you fell in love with.
You usually are reluctant to end relationships. And sometimes you're the last to know that things are ending!

Number of True Loves You'll Have: 4

Number of Times You'll Have Your Heart Broken: 1

You are most compatible with people born on the 9th, 18th, and 27th of the month.

What Does Your Birth Date Mean For Your Love Life?

So so true... Kaya lang ung # of true loves? 4? Nyek! E isa pa lang ako e...Si Ken... Harhar... =p

I belong in the year...

2007-03-01T16:42:21Z

You Belong in 1980

If you scored...

1950 - 1959: You're fun loving, romantic, and more than a little innocent. See you at the drive in!

1960 - 1969: You are a free spirit with a huge heart. Love, peace, and happiness rule - oh, and drugs too.

1970 - 1979: Bold and brash, you take life by the horns. Whether you're partying or protesting, you give it your all!

1980 - 1989: Wild, over the top, and just a little bit cheesy. You're colorful at night - and successful during the day.

1990 - 1999: With you anything goes! You're grunge one day, ghetto fabulous the next. It's all good!

What Year Do You Belong In?

Hmmm.. Dapat lang diba? Kasi 1981 naman ang birthyear ko e... =)

My Love Style is...

2007-03-01T16:33:40Z

Your Love Style is Agape

You are a caring, kind, and selfless partner.
Unsurprisingly, your love style is the most rare.
You are willing to sacrfice your world for your sweetie.
Except it doesn't really feel like sacrifice to you.
For you, nothing feels better than giving to the one you love.

What's Your Love Style?

hmmm... more or less... Kaya nga t-a-n-g-a!!!

JOHANNE means...

2007-03-01T16:28:49Z

What Johanne Means

J is for Joyous

O is for Old

H is for Handy

A is for Active

N is for Nice

N is for Neat

E is for Earnest

What Does Your Name Mean?

I love Starbucks!

2007-03-01T16:26:51Z

You Are a Frappacino

At your best, you are: fun loving, sweet, and modern

At your worst, you are: childish and over indulgent

You drink coffee when: you're craving something sweet

Your caffeine addiction level: low

What Kind of Coffee Are You?

Perfect!!! =)

From Lola Agnes!!!

2007-03-01T16:08:45Z

Your Birthdate: January 18

You are a cohesive force - able to bring many people together for a common cause.
You tend to excel in work situations, but you also facilitate a lot of social gatherings too.
Beyond being a good leader, you are good at inspiring others.
You also keep your powerful emotions in check - you know when to emote and when to repress.

Your strength: Emotional maturity beyond your years

Your weakness: Wearing yourself down with too many responsibilities

Your power color: Crimson red

Your power symbol: Snowflake

Your power month: September

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

Naks!!! Responsible daw ako? =) I like it! =)

Back to Normal...

2007-02-16T21:06:10Z

I am just glad that everything's back to normal...

Met his ex...or should I say 'mistress' or 'bebot' or 'friend' a while ago...hahahahahahaha!

What an asshole?!

It's about time!!! Damn!!! It took me a month to realize it... Lech!

It's Valentine's Day!

2007-02-13T20:08:51Z

"Happy Valentines Day! =) mwah!"

---Just got this message... It made my heart beat so fast... In a way, it made me happy...

I can finally say that my Valentines Day's complete... =) Lol!

But in the end... after thinking about it... it only made me sad.

A very hopeless "Me"...

2007-02-12T21:53:50Z

Why is it so hard for me to accept the truth? Is it because the truth hurts? How come everytime I see him, I feel like crying? Akala ko wala na akong maiiiyak... But everytime na lang na makikita ko sya, lagi na lang akong nasasaktan... Unconsciously, tutula na lang luha ko... Ganoon pala talaga noh?
It's funny how I always give love advices to my friends...Pero kapag ako na humingi, i know what they are trying to tell me... I understand what they are talking about BUT, hindi sya ma-digest ng brain ko...I know what I should do. The right thing. But I can't. Ang hirap. Oh well!

I miss him terribly... I just can't stop myself from missing him... I can't stop myself from being close sa kanya... Alam kong hindi na pwede...hindi na dapat...pero eto pa din ako, go pa rin... It's not that I am doing a bad thing cause I am not. I despise all other women who are doing those things... Sabi nga nila, ang tanga ko naman na daw masyado. E aminado naman ako dun e... But until now, I just can't feel it... I can't feel that he's like that. Is it because I love him too much? Maybe the only thing that would wake me up from this nightmare is if he'll be the one to tell me.

Naiinis talaga ako... Can't you see I am hurting? Everytime na lang na lalapitan mo ko o kaya maglalambing ka, parang sinasaksak ako... Ganoon sya kasakit... Bakit di mo na lang kaya ako saksakin para isang beses na lang ako masasaktan? Nakakainis talaga! Pero bakit pa din ako umaasa? Umaasa sa alin? Kahit harap-harapan na go pa din... When I saw you being sweet and all to that girl, para akong binuhusan ng malamig na tubig! Ganoon ang feeling! Then when you saw me looking at you, you approached me and asked "Musta?" Hahaha!!! So funny!!! But after all this time... mahal pa din kita...

jeiem_zhu @ 2007-02-10T07:57:00

2007-02-10T00:05:14Z

Life is a mystery. Parang love... Love, up until now, is still a mystery to me... Haha! Sabi nga nila, no one can ever define the real meaning of love... Sabi din nila love knows no reasons... love knows no lies. Love defies all reasons, love has no eyes. But love is not blind. Love sees but doesn't mind. Now, I finally understand what it means. For you to be able to understand it, you have to experience it...

A Broken Hearted Me...

2007-02-02T21:34:50Z

As soon as I got back in the office after our lunch break (which we had it at Metrowalk), I tried hard to think on what to do next... As I was working on my database and listening to some music, I have finally realized that the more I see him, the harder it gets.

When I came to this realization, I was not surprise at all. I just knew it. All along, I knew that this will happen sooner or later. I must admit, after knowing that thing about him, I am still hoping for someone who will retract everything. That somehow, it was just a lie. But why would he lie anyways, right?

Somebody once said: "I don't know why we all hang on to something we know we're better off letting go. It's like we're scared to lose what we don't really have. Some of us say, 'We'd rather have that something than absolutely nothing.' But the truth is ~ TO HAVE IT HALFWAY IS HARDER THAN NOT HAVING IT AT ALL! =(

Hay Life!!!

2007-02-02T14:50:10Z

I went to Angelo's Family Day this morning and I had a blast! I went with Gia (Angelo's mom), Abby, Ate Arlene, Jesse & Angelo. After that, I went back to the office to help Mienne do some QA. We were working since 1PM. I went home around 5PM just to take a bath and change my clothes. At around 630PM, I went back to the office. At 830PM, I went to Metrowalk to join Gia & Abby for dinner. Oh yes!! This is our usual schedule every Friday. We go there every Friday to have dinner and watch our fave band... =(

How Did I Fall In Love With You?

2007-02-01T22:44:41Z

Remember when, we never needed each other
The best of friends like
Sister and Brother
We understood, we'd never be,
Alone

Those days are gone, and I want you so much
The night is long and I need your touch
Don't know what to say
I never meant to feel this way
Don't want to be
Alone tonight

chorus:
What can I do, to make you mine
Falling so hard so fast this time
What did I say, what did you do?
How did I fall in love with you?

I hear your voice
And I start to tremble
Brings back the child that, I resemble

I cannot pretend, that we can still be friends
Don't want to be,
Alone tonight

chorus:
What can I do, to make you mine
Falling so hard so fast this time
What did I say, what did you do?
How did I fall in love with you?

Bridge:
Oh I want to say this right
And it has to be tonight
Just need you to know, oh yeah

I don't want to live this life
I don't want to say goodbye
With you I wanna spend
The rest of my life

chorus:
What can I do, to make you mine
Falling so hard so fast this time
What did I say, what did you do?
How did I fall in love with you?

What can I do, to make you mine
Falling so hard so fast this time
Everything's changed, we never knew

How did I fall, in love, with you?

Sabi nya:

"Loving is a lot like watching a 20min fireworks display... exciting, emotional, romantic, sweet, memorable...but, it also ends as dramatic as it began. It fades slowly into thin air and as much as you wanted to keep watching, there's nothing you can do to make it stay. In the end, all that there's left is a starless night and the fact that in this life... Good things never last..."

Ang sad noh? This message alone made me cry again... All along I thought I can just be friends with him... It is just so hard for me to bring back the good old days I had with him... The mere sight of him makes me cry... Is it really so hard to be happy? Well, sabi nila, "Happiness is a choice". You have to choose to be happy in order for you to be happy. But why is it that everytime I choose to be happy, I always end up being sad?

Xmas Party Ba Kamo???!

2006-12-20T19:00:46Z

Christmas Party?! I just attended 4 Xmas Parties last week... It was exhausting but I had so much fun...

We had our Xmas Party at Mugen...

Having Dinner with Abby, Elna & Dan

Having Dinner with Abby...

Me, Gia & Abby posing for our "Tres Marias" pic!!!

Livewire playing for US!!! They said that it was suppose to be a surprise but then, we found it out even before the day of our party...They are so nice and so good!!! You better check them out...

Me & Abby with Livewire's Nelly (bassist), Aris (drummer) & Jon (guitarist) chatting & camwhoring before their gig...

Our "gift giving" party in the office...

Me & Baboy...

Havenlink's Xmas Party at Mugen... We were the Judges for their "Performance of the Night" Contest...

I love December!!! I love partying!!! =)

It's nice to post again...

2006-11-06T14:58:08Z

It's been a while since my last post.. hehe.. Been busy with something...
Pakshet! I hate this feeling!!! Ewan ko ba! Kung kelan pa ko tumanda tsaka ako nagkakaganito... Hay!!!
I should have known better...
Dapat di na lang ako lumabas sa lungga ko e...
Dapat kasi natuto na ako noon at di ko na inulit...
Malay ko ba naman na magkakaganito...
Dapat di na lang ako sumama nun...
Dapat natulog na lang ako...
Kainis talaga!!!
Ngayon, pano na?
Ayoko na ma-hurt...
Sana ma-save ako ng Honey ko this time... =(

Three Years Ago...

2006-09-13T14:29:13Z

Three Years Ago...
Three Long Years...
And still, here I am...
Counting and hoping for more years to come...

A lot has changed... And I can definitely say: I am a better person now... All because of the gorgeous guy I met three years ago...

Just want to say, Thank you for the road we shared together... =)

Life's a Journey...

2006-06-19T20:50:58Z

Do not undermine your worth by comparing yourself with others.
It is because we are different that each of us is special.

Do not set your goals by what other people deem important.
Only you know what is best for you.
Do not take for granted the things closest to your heart.

Cling to them as you would your life, for without them, life is meaningless.
Do not let your life slip through your fingers by living in the past nor for the future.
By living your life one day at a time, you live all of the days of your life.
Do not give up when you still have something to give.
Nothing is really over until the moment you stop trying.
It is a fragile thread that binds us to each other.

Do not be afraid to encounter risks.
It is by taking chances that we learn how to be brave.
Do not shut love out of your life by saying it is impossible to find.
The quickest way to receive love is to give love.
The fastest way to lose love is too hold it too tightly.
In addition, the best way to keep love is to give it wings

Do not dismiss your dreams.
To be without dreams is to be without hope.
To be without hope is to be without purpose.
Do not run through life so fast that you forget not only where you have been,
but also where you are going.

Life is not a race, but a journey to be savored each step of the way.

... this was sent to me from a friend in highschool... It's been quite some time now that i last updated this journal... don't know why i can't find the time... maybe i've been busy with some stuff... i miss writing my thoughts... i miss a lot of things... things at work are quite ok, or so i thought... been hiring new people... changing our operating system from Microsoft to Linux (well, I love Microsoft more)... been handling the same account for like a month now... can't say i still enjoy working in this kind of business (haller!!! been working here for the past 2 years and 5 months)... a friend of mine is back here in the office... we go way back... we've been friends since college...maybe just maybe (keeping my fingers crossed) ... i hate what if's... i hate having regrets... i hate pretending... i hate thinking of what my plans are in the future... i hate being sad... i hate disappointments... i hate holding back... i already want to move on... i want to let go... i want to forget about the past... i want to start a new life... a new journey... but why can't i? i am still hanging on... but for how long? i have a lot of questions... but it seems no one cares to listen... can't find the answers... i just wish someone would just tap me and say: "it's ok... everything will be fine..." i just need another sign...just one more sign before i can finally say that "my journey ends here..."

Reasons Why Employees & Managers Underperform

2006-04-19T20:57:15Z

Employees:
They don't know why they should do it.
They don't know how to do it.
They don't know what they are supposed to do.
They think your way will not work.
They think their way is better.
They think something else is more important.
There are no positive consequences for doing the task.
They think they are doing it when they, in actuality, are not.
They are rewarded for not doing it.
They are punished for doing what they are supposed to do.
They expect a negative consequence for doing it.
Their poor performance does not receive a negative consequence.
There are obstacles beyond their control.
Their personal limits prevent them from completing the task.
Personal Issues.
The task cannot be done.

Managers:
Procrastination
Perfectionism
Analysis Paralysis
Lack of Confidence
Dislike of Risk
Loss of Passion
Wrong Priorities
Disorganization
Failure to Involve Others
Lack of Commitment

We are all, to some extent, both employees (even CEOs work for their customers) and managers (we all self-manage much of our work). And our behaviour in our work lives is often not that different in our home lives: In both roles there are similar reasons why we don't do what we should do, even when we know exactly what we should do.

Summer...

2006-04-19T20:50:55Z

I haven't updated my journal for quite some time now. My last update was before my HongKong trip. I just can't find the words on how to describe my HK experience. It was amazing, spectacular, wonderful, great... PERFECT! It's an experience I will treasure for the rest of my life...

And now, summer is here... 2 more days and we're off to Puerto Galera. My last visit to Puerto was last 2002, just after my college graduation. I was with my college friends. Now, I'm going there again but this time, it's with my officemates. I can't wait to go to the beach again!!!

And next weekend, me and my zzisterzz will have our summer get away! We still don't know where to spend it though kasi konti lang budget namin. Why? Naubos na ng mga boys namin ang aming mga datung!!! Hahaha!!! Pero kahit saan man yun, I am sure, it will be a blast... again!!!

I am going to HK!!!!

2006-03-20T18:26:29Z

Oh my gosh!!! Just finished my work and now, I am off!!!! Yipee!!! I need to pack my things now!!! Pakshet!!! Cram cram cram cram!!!! Grrrrrr!!!

Oh men!!! I am so excited to see my Honey again!!!! I am so damn excited!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! =P

...the frozen clock

2006-03-09T07:02:43Z

Before, I used to think that I was a frozen clock... I was like in this place where I can't move... now, i finally realized that it's not bec I can't... it's because i REFUSE to... move on with my life... try something different... move forward and just forget about the past...

Somebody said that he thinks i should change my batteries... batteries that once made me happy and feel complete... it's just so scary sometimes... i am used to it already.. i just can't imagine living my life without it...

It's so hard to be honest sometimes... with how you feel... pretending to be happy when in fact, you're not...

It's so hard to do what is right... because doing what is wrong is the one giving you comfort...

It's so hard to follow your mind... because not following it makes you feel weak...

It's so hard to be optimistic... because doing so, at some point, you're bound to be disapponted and frustrated all at the same time...

It's so hard to try new stuff... because sometimes trying means failing...